Day at the Spaw

I was looking in the mirror the other day, and I told my mother that I needed to go to the spaw.



Yes, my fur is a bit shaggy. So shaggy, that a few of my Border Collie and Sheltie friends tried to herd me at the recent agility trial! Yes, it is definitely time for a trim.

Off I went to the spaw. I had a wonderful time with my favorite groomer, Lisa. Oh, she was full of thing to tell me since our last meeting. Of course, I had to tell her about all my blogging friends, my new WFT friends that I met at Earthdog, and all my other activities. I was also secretly wishing she didn't give me a bad 'do like she did last time.

But, have no fear. I had a new 'do and I think look quite handsome.



The girls, however, were joshing me a bit for my fur. What do they know?! They don't get to go to the spaw! They were rolling around laughing at me. Oh, who cares. I look brilliant!

Oh, she has done it now!

Sometimes, I cannot believe the length my mother will go to save a few dollars, or her back. Never mind it might humiliate, me, her only WFT extrodinaire!

Mother seems a bit preoccupied with my mudfur. I had it caked quite nicely on myself. She had sent veiled threats for several days, but I thought all this silly talk of a bath would blow away like the wind.

On Mondays, Katherine, Calvin, and I all attend agility class. Auntie was riding with us for a change. We normally take Calvin with us so Auntie doesn't have to drive home to pick him up before class. When we arrived at the normal place we turn to go to our classes, Mother went straight instead.

Well, we were ALL certain that Mother had flipped her lid and had suddenly forgotten how to get to agility class. We all knew this day was coming, and Katherine wasn't peering over Mother's shoulder as she normally does, so I was blaming Katherine for getting lax on the job.

We turned a block later. And, ended up here:



This so-called Pet Wash was located in a CARWASH. Can you believe that my Mother took me to a carwash for a BATH. I was just livid. How could any dog of my stature be so humiliated by being bathed in a CARWASH. We all know I am like a Ferrari, but I deserve go to the SPAW, to be catered to. NOT to go to a self-serve car/pet wash.



My mother grabs me out of my seat and is saying something regarding "Oh, it looks quite respectable, Sam. Don't be such a whiner! Look there's a nice tub, a ramp, etc.

I was NOT convinced and when she plopped me in the tub and attached the leash to my collar, I looked around this "establishment." OMD. What is that DIAL?!!



I hope it doesn't say HOT WAX. I certainly intend to keep all my fur!!! Disinfectant? What? De-SKUNK? What is she going to do to me??!!



OH, I am totally humiliated, and can only hope that none of my dog pals can see me here at the car/dog wash.

I do have to say that the water was warm. Not too hot, and not too cold. It did come from the sprayer in a nice, gentle fashion. But, still. Where is my favorite stylist? Where are the treats???



After SHE had finished scrubbing me raw and spraying me off with the misty hose, my mother blankly looks around and says.. Oh Sammie, I forgot your towel.

WHAT? Will my turmoil never end? She switches the dial over to DRY and attempts to dry me off with a hose that has air coming out of it. OH NO, I say and I start bounding around, trying to get away from it. Unfortunately, I am still tethered to the tub and cannot move. So, I did the one thing that would make HER stop it. I started shaking.

That did it, Mother finally relented and turned off the stupid dryer and brought an end to my suffering. I ended up wrapped up in Auntie's coat, since it was still cold here for a spoiled, wet dog. Thanks goodness for Auntie, is all I have to say.

Water Torture!!! Call 9-1-1!!

After a rousing afternoon of digging for every rodent and/or finding numerous treasures in the backyard, my mother bade me to come in. She said we were going to the pet shop. OH JOY! Perhaps I can persuade her to purchase a new toy. Better yet, Katherine and Zorra were NOT going with us. Hurrah!!

Oh, I had visions of new balls and tug toys, perhaps some completely NEW chew toy that I had not yet become acquainted with. I was shivering with anticipation when we pulled up to the store.

Mother walked briskly up to the cashier, and I heard the words come out of her mouth, but it was as if they were in slow motion.. ... D - 0 - G W-A S H please.

NOOOOO.

The next thing I realized, I was in the washtub. Perhaps if I look cute and smile, she will be so striken with remorse over what she is planning to do that she will let me down... I am smiling, Mother. See??



Oh dear, she doesn't seem to get my point. I will just try to escape on my own. Get out of the way woman!! I am making a break for it. DRAT that leash holding me here.




I have worked up my best pitiful look. Oh Mother, how could you torture me so? What did I do to deserve this??!! Katherine put you up to this, didn't she? Or, Auntie. Is she still upset over that unfortunate pants pocket incident?? I'm so very sorry.



Oh great, now she's scrubbing where I had stashed extra mud to ensure my fur retained that wiry texture that WFT are known for. Just great.. I will have to give myself another treatment later. All that hard work......




MOTHER!! YOU GOT SOAP IN MY EYES!!!!! Oh, this has turned into sheer torture. I obviously must assist myself, since she is so stooooopid as to see there is SOAP IN MY EYES.



I will kill you in your sleep. That is what I am thinking now, but yet, Mother, you laugh?



Ahhhhhh, a nice towel. I love the towel. That means our time here is coming to a close.



Here is my impersonation of a prize fighter. I float like a butterfly and sting like a bee.



Oh Mother, I am sorry for those dreadful things I said. You are right, I do feel much better.. Now, where's my ###$$# treat??!!

Wash day

I'm taking over the 'puter today because Katie is outside bossin' everyone around and Sammie is gettin reddy to go to the "spaw." I know I am glad he's gettin' owt of the howse. He needs a haircut baaaad.

He's so dirty he looks like a pig.



Turn to the right, Sammie. Show everyone what a mess u r.





YOUR OTHER RIGHT SAMMIE!




He always comes back tellin' tall tails about goin' to the spaw and how horrible it is. I think he's pullin sumfin'. I called the puparrazi and they are gonna follow him around today.

HE's not at a spaw! He's at a bar!



Now, he's at a restaurant...





Yikes!! Mad dog...... Oh, he's just sudsy.




He's all dressed up in towels. This goin' to the spaw thing looks kinda fun to me. I am gonna tell mommie that I want to go to the spaw.



Oh, Sammie just came home and is tellin us how tired he is from the spaw. Hmmmmm. At least he looks and (sniff, sniff) smells cleaner.