Sometimes, I cannot believe the length my mother will go to save a few dollars, or her back. Never mind it might humiliate, me, her only WFT extrodinaire!
Mother seems a bit preoccupied with my mudfur. I had it caked quite nicely on myself. She had sent veiled threats for several days, but I thought all this silly talk of a bath would blow away like the wind.
On Mondays, Katherine, Calvin, and I all attend agility class. Auntie was riding with us for a change. We normally take Calvin with us so Auntie doesn't have to drive home to pick him up before class. When we arrived at the normal place we turn to go to our classes, Mother went straight instead.
Well, we were ALL certain that Mother had flipped her lid and had suddenly forgotten how to get to agility class. We all knew this day was coming, and Katherine wasn't peering over Mother's shoulder as she normally does, so I was blaming Katherine for getting lax on the job.
We turned a block later. And, ended up here:

This so-called Pet Wash was located in a CARWASH. Can you believe that my Mother took me to a carwash for a BATH. I was just livid. How could any dog of my stature be so humiliated by being bathed in a CARWASH. We all know I am like a Ferrari, but I deserve go to the SPAW, to be catered to. NOT to go to a self-serve car/pet wash.

My mother grabs me out of my seat and is saying something regarding "Oh, it looks quite respectable, Sam. Don't be such a whiner! Look there's a nice tub, a ramp, etc.
I was NOT convinced and when she plopped me in the tub and attached the leash to my collar, I looked around this "establishment." OMD. What is that DIAL?!!

I hope it doesn't say HOT WAX. I certainly intend to keep all my fur!!! Disinfectant? What? De-SKUNK? What is she going to do to me??!!

OH, I am totally humiliated, and can only hope that none of my dog pals can see me here at the car/dog wash.
I do have to say that the water was warm. Not too hot, and not too cold. It did come from the sprayer in a nice, gentle fashion. But, still. Where is my favorite stylist? Where are the treats???

After SHE had finished scrubbing me raw and spraying me off with the misty hose, my mother blankly looks around and says.. Oh Sammie, I forgot your towel.
WHAT? Will my turmoil never end? She switches the dial over to DRY and attempts to dry me off with a hose that has air coming out of it. OH NO, I say and I start bounding around, trying to get away from it. Unfortunately, I am still tethered to the tub and cannot move. So, I did the one thing that would make HER stop it. I started shaking.
That did it, Mother finally relented and turned off the stupid dryer and brought an end to my suffering. I ended up wrapped up in Auntie's coat, since it was still cold here for a spoiled, wet dog. Thanks goodness for Auntie, is all I have to say.